In Romans 12:2 we find these words:

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will.

The world’s response to transgression is, generally speaking, punitive – when you do something wrong, you serve a sentence, pay a fine or, at school, get a detention.

Our model at Donvale is very different. We apply a restorative justice model, which means that where, say, students are in serious conflict, we bring them together in an environment where the perpetrator can hear the effects of their destructive behaviour upon the victim.

Once the perpetrator understands the damage caused, there is room for remorse, compassion and the opportunity to restore the relationship that has been broken.

It sometimes happens, however, that students may find themselves repeatedly involved in restorative conversations because a relationship may have been temporarily repaired, but there’s been no transformation of mind – or attitude.

How then do we create an environment where the change in behaviour is not temporary, but rather permanent, that is to say transformative? Working with my Faith Development and Wellbeing colleague Adam Bryant, we’ve found that slowing down the restorative conversation process, working with the students' peers, friendship groups and families, has helped students reflect not just upon their inappropriate behaviours, but rather the fears, frustrations and hurts that often lie behind them.

We have experienced a profound sense of encouragement in seeing many students experience this shift of consciousness, the small and sometimes barely perceptible permanent shifts as well as the more obvious shifts. It is truly rewarding work.

Adam’s passion for bringing blokes together to connect and support one another is another case study in transformation. Events such as a car show or a paper plane competition (complete with sausage sizzles, naturally!) were designed with just enough space to encourage men to get together, share the challenges and joys of parenting, and support each other in this critical and precious vocation of raising our children.

In our most recent gathering, we took a gamble. It was a dads and male guardians night only, where we invited one of our own, Mark Purser, to share some stories of resilience and the lessons he had learned as a professional and, more importantly, as a father.

At the end we invited the audience to reflect with each other about what had moved them as they listened to Mark’s stories, and then share that with the larger group. Some of the feedback even rivalled the presentation in depth and honesty.

To do this meant we had to fly in the face of an unhelpful and often incomplete idea of masculinity – the Australian “lone wolf” image. It required more than restoration - it required transformation.

Adam and I are now turning our minds to other school-based programs and activities. We have a couple of self-defence based programs where we are seeing students discover that simple mastery over their bodies can be transferred to other spheres of their lives.

We are also exploring more explicitly faith-based activities where faith becomes an invitation to participate in God’s remaking of the world, an opportunity for students to find their vocation, their place in the world.

It is indeed a world that sorely needs souls marked by compassion, curiosity and courage, no longer conformed to the pattern of this world, but transformed by the renewing of [their] minds … able to test and approve what God’s will is - His good, pleasing and perfect will.

What a privilege be part of such an environment at DCC!

Networks

'Act justly, love kindness, and walk humbly with God'

Issue 13 · 07 Sep 2023

In this issue