Friendship is a Skill

For young teenage boys, friendships are an important part of feeling connected, confident and settled at school. A strong sense of belonging helps boys feel happier, more secure and more ready to learn. However, friendships at this age can also be complicated, and it is not unusual for things to go wrong from time to time.

In the early teenage years, boys are still learning to navigate loyalty, trust, humour, conflict, disappointment, and changing social groups. Sometimes a joke goes too far. Sometimes boys exclude others without fully understanding the impact. At times, group chats can become unkind, rumours can spread quickly, or boys may stay silent when they know someone is being treated unfairly. Some boys find it hard to say sorry, to admit they are hurt, or to ask for help when a friendship changes.

Dr Justin Coulson reminds us that children do not automatically know how to be good friends. Friendship is a skill, and like any skill, it needs to be taught, practised and encouraged.

Six important friendship habits young people need to learn are:

Standing up for a friend in their absence
Sharing important news with a friend
Providing emotional support when it is needed
Trusting and confiding in each other
Volunteering help when it is required
Making an effort to make the other person happy.

This means not joining in when others laugh, tease or gossip about someone who is not there. For boys, this can take courage, especially when they want to fit in. A simple comment such as, “That’s not fair,” or “Leave him out of it,” can make a real difference.

Good friends include one another and keep each other in the loop. This matters when plans are being made, teams are being formed, or social groups are shifting. Boys also need to learn the difference between sharing helpful information and passing on gossip that may hurt someone.

Boys do not need to have all the answers. Sometimes being a good friend simply means noticing when someone is not okay, sitting with him, checking in, or saying, “Are you alright?”. This helps boys learn that care and concern are signs of strength, not weakness.

Friendships deepen when boys can be honest with one another. If a friend shares something personal, it is important that this confidence is respected. Breaking trust, sharing screenshots, or repeating private information can quickly damage a friendship.

Good friends notice when someone is struggling and offer help before being asked. This might mean helping with schoolwork, including someone in a game, standing beside someone who is isolated, or simply checking that a mate is okay.

Friendship requires small acts of kindness. Saving a seat, inviting someone to join in, remembering something important, or sending a kind message can all help boys build stronger and healthier relationships.

As parents and carers, you can support boys by talking openly about friendship not only when something goes wrong but also as part of everyday life. Helpful questions might include: “Was anyone left out today?”, “Did you see someone being treated unfairly?”, “What would a good friend do in that situation?” or “Is there someone you need to make things right with?”

When boys experience friendship difficulties, our role is not always to fix the problem for them, but to help them understand what has happened, take responsibility where needed, and practise more respectful and courageous ways of relating to others.

It would help us enormously if you could contact the Year Coordinator if your son’s friendship interviews are affecting his wellbeing and learning. Professor Donna Cross, one of Australia’s leading researchers in bullying prevention, has shown through her work that bullying is not simply a matter of individual behaviour. It is strongly shaped by peer culture, bystanders, relationships, school climate and the willingness of young people to speak up when something is wrong. This is particularly important for teenage boys, who may notice unkind behaviour but stay silent because they do not want to be targeted themselves or seen as “dobbers”.

Friendship is a skill. With patience, guidance and practice, boys can learn to build friendships marked by loyalty, kindness, trust, courage and respect.

Boys: Building Strong Young Men from the Inside Out

He’s disappearing. Behind the closed door, lost in screens, making choices that keep you up at night. He’s navigating a world designed to confuse him – algorithms designed to addict him – a world parents don’t understand and can’t break into. The headlines scream crisis. They warn us that boys are in deep trouble… and it’s getting worse.

But it doesn’t have to be like this.

Dr Justin Coulson has a different story to tell. In Boys, Coulson reveals what decades of research suggests: when boys get what they actually need, they thrive. Not through force or fixing, but through connection, meaningful challenge, and someone who refuses to give up on them.

This presentation hands you the ‘Playbook’. It cuts through the noise with practical, research-backed strategies for the battles you’re fighting right now. Gaming. Pornography. Self-control. Friendships. School motivation. How to discipline without destroying trust. How to stay close when he’s pushing away.

But beneath the tactics lies something more powerful: a vision of masculinity worth fighting for. Boys who help others feel safer and stronger. Who create surplus value. Who become not just good men, but the best version of themselves. Your son already has everything he needs to get there.

Sign up here: Wednesday 17 June, 7:00 PM AEST

Notice of Withdrawal

The second term of 2026 is quickly drawing to a close and thoughts to 2027 are beginning to take shape. Family circumstances change and some parents are considering other options for their son/s. If that is the case, please have a conversation with your son’s Year Coordinator in the first instance, especially if your lad is unhappy and seeking a change of school.

As outlined in the College’s published Terms and Conditions of Enrolment, I kindly remind parents/carers that at least one full term’s written notice to the Principal is required if they intend to withdraw their son from St Patrick’s College. This notice period helps the College plan appropriately for student placements and ensures continuity of learning for all boys. Where sufficient notice is not provided, a full term’s fees and charges will be payable in lieu of notice.

We encourage families to take a moment to review the full Conditions of Enrolment available on the College website to ensure they are familiar with these requirements and to contact the College should they have any questions.

Student Orbit App

Student Orbit App was launched at the end of last week and by the start of Term 3, replacing SPC App. From the start of Term 3, the SPC App will then be disabled and no longer used.

I sent an email to all our students, and their parents/carers last Friday afternoon, because boys should seek permission from parents/carers before downloading any app to their mobile phone.

These are the instructions that went out specifically for the STUDENT ORBIT APP. There is a different process for parents/carers that was sent out earlier this year.

To download the app:

Go to: https://student.tassorbit.com.au/SPCSTUDENT
You’ll be directed to the Apple or Google store.
Tap the Install button. Once the app is installed, our school will be loaded as an account.
Tap on our school’s name.
Enter your Student Café credentials on the login screen.

If the school does not automatically load, enter this school code: SPCSTUDENT and click submit.

We look forward to hearing your feedback.

We know that many boys do not have mobile phones. They can continue to use TASS Student Café.

If this is the case in your family, be aware that parents/carers can download Student Orbit on their phones and allow the boys to see the information contained there very quickly to assist in their organisation and set reminders.

The information that is in Student Orbit is a little different than that contained in Parent Orbit so make sure your son is only accessing Student Orbit.

Staff News

Ms Nikki Zhong (Music) has advised me of her resignation from the College. Her final date is yet to be determined, as she is willing to work with us until we find a replacement. Her accompaniment of Year 12 Music students will go ahead as planned.

Dr Vittoria Lavorato

Principal

SPC boys can do anything!

**except divide by zero

College Notices

Important Notice: Student Photos - Years 5 to 12