Principal's Message
Dear Parents/Guardians,
As adults we understand that relationships are tricky things. How often do we find ourselves unsure about how we deal with a disagreement / falling out with people in our lives?
Imagine, then, how difficult CHILDREN find navigating their way around this complex world of friendships?
The one thing that we definitely DO know, is that when parents / carers get involved IT NEVER ENDS WELL!
Under no circumstances should parents EVER speak to other children ( OR their parents) about incidents at School. I have seen this numerous times and the results are always the same.......the children end up working out their issue while the parents, who often WERE friends, never talk to each other again!
Below is an article from Michael Grose, a leading Australian Parent Educator, that talks about what parents CAN do to support their children navigate this complex issue.
Steve Darcy (Principal)
HERE'S WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD IS STRUGGLING WITH A FRIENDSHIP
As parents, it’s natural to worry when you see your child standing on the periphery of the playground.
We live in a culture that often equates social success with popularity—the more birthday invitations on the fridge, the “better” your child must be doing.
That makes life tough for you and your child.
Not every child is a social butterfly.
For many children, a small social circle isn’t a sign of failure; it’s a sign of their temperament.
They may be slow to warm up in social situations, so they need time to feel comfortable. They may be more down the introvert end of the introversion-extraversion scale.
Conversely, your child may rush into new social situations, saying and doing things that don’t help them make friends.
These children can use a little social coaching to help them along.
Whatever your child’s struggles, don’t panic. Use these four strategies to tackle your concerns (that may not really be struggles at all):
1. Reframe the Friendship Story (we tell ourselves)
Before you try to resolve the problem, ask yourself if there is a problem at all.
Some children are onlookers—they like to observe the landscape before diving in.
Others simply prefer a small group of friends. They find large groups draining.
More commonly known as introverts, this latter group find groups of one or two easier to manage and negotiate, especially if they come from a small family.
Keep in mind:
- The One Good Friend Rule: Research consistently shows that having one solid, supportive friend is a significant protector against bullying and loneliness. If your child has one person they trust, they are doing well.
Avoid Labels: Be careful not to describe your child as shy or lonely within their earshot. This becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Instead, describe them as observant or someone who chooses their friends carefully.
2. Coach them in Skills (not their personality)
Socialising is a set of skills, much like riding a bike or learning a language.
If your child is struggling, they don’t need a lecture; they need some coaching about how to make and keep friends. They also may need help managing the anxiety of social entry.
Start with:
- The Low-Stakes Entry: Many kids simply don’t know how to join in a game. Give them a short social script that they can use. Instead of asking, “Can I play?”, coach them to look for a game in progress, stand nearby, and offer a helpful comment: “Who’s winning? Do you guys need another player?"
Practice the Social Reconnaissance Technique: Often, kids who struggle to make friends charge in too quickly or hover too far away. Teach them to read the room before making a move. Encourage them to watch a group for 30 seconds to identify what game is being played, what the vibe is and who the best person to approach may be.
3. Provide Plenty of Scaffolding (parental assistance)
If your child’s social circle is small because they struggle with sharing, following others or bossy behaviour, use those moments as teaching opportunities.
Try these two strategies:
- The Home Turf Advantage: Organise short, structured playdates (90 minutes is often plenty) at your house. Having their own toys and space provides a sense of security.
Activity-Based Socialising: For children who find small talk difficult, steer them toward side-by-side or activity-based socialising. Think LEGO clubs, coding classes, or sports. When the focus is on a task, the pressure to be socially skilled evaporates. Also, shared interest is a great socialising agent.
4. Build their Inner Strength (the key to real happiness)
Ultimately, you want your child to be comfortable in their own company. Acknowledge their ability to manage boredom and keep themselves occupied without needing constant validation by others.
Spending time on your own is a gift, particularly for always-on-the-go boys.
Here are two ideas to try:
- Celebrate Solitude: Distinguish between loneliness (a pained state) and solitude (a productive, peaceful state). If your child is happily reading or drawing alone, don’t force them to “go find a friend.”
- Validate their Discomfort: If they feel left out, acknowledge it. “It feels a bit heavy in your chest when you see them playing without you, doesn’t it?” This validates their feelings without making them victims.
Finally…..
Parenting a child who marches to a different social drum requires patience, perspective, and a shift in our own expectations.
True social success isn’t measured by a packed social calendar or the loudest voice in the playground.
It’s measured by a child’s confidence in who they are, knowing they have the resilience to navigate their world at their own pace.
And that includes the world of relationships.
END OF YEAR DATE FOR STUDENTS
The final school day for students, this year, will be TUESDAY 15 DECEMBER.
RAFFLE PRIZES NEEDED
Our School's major fundraiser for the year, the COLOUR CRAZE, will take place early in Term 4, Friday 30 October.
Our Parent Fundraising Committee are looking for major prizes for the raffle and have contacted numerous local businesses for support.
If you or a member of your family has a business that can donate a prize please forward your details to our School Office at info@stpsutherland.catholic.edu.au.
All businesses that donate to this raffle will receive advertising space in our fortnightly Newsletter throughout Term 4.
BUNNINGS FUNDRAISER
Thank you to all our parents who gave up their time recently to run the BBQ at Kirrawee Bunnings recently.
Kendal W(Abby 6M, Jeremy 4M), Jo T- (Lucy 6M), Carolina C B (Emily KP), Brianna R (Amelie 4N), Nikki B (Zac 3P, Max KM), Victoria M (Holland KP), Luciana S (Lucia 5N, Franco KM), Andrew B (Aubrey 1P), Paula D - (Cara 4P), Caroline C (Harper 6P, Quinn 3N), Sarah D (Abigail 6M, Eloise 2N), Satwinder S (Kasey 5P), Jody G (Angus KM), Heidi S (Imogen 6N, Fletcher 3N), Alex H (Dylan KN), Scott G(Grace 1M), Rob K (Hannah 4M, Max KM), David F + Kathryn G (Jemima 4P, Alfie 2P), Steve W (Chloe KP), Nicole K (Sofia 4N, Georgia 1M) and Jennifer Q (Astrid KN).
They managed to raised $3 887 which will go towards new playground resources for our students.
Special mention to Iryna R (Alexander KM) who provided expertise and support on the day and to Elizabeth W (Abby 6M, Jeremy 4M) for organising, purchasing, transporting etc.
COLOUR CRAZE
This event, taking place in Term 4, is our major fundraiser for the year.
Tickets are currently on sale for the MONSTER RAFFLE ($5 each / 3 for $10) with all money raised to go towards the purchasing of resources for our students. There will be a weekly prize for the students in whatever class raises the most funds during that 7 -day period. You can purchase your tickets here - https://batistascuba.my.canva.site/colour-craze-website
More details were sent via Compass earlier in the week.
There will also be an entry cost ($5 per individual or $10 per family) for the students to take part. More information about this will be sent home next Term.
MUSICAL SUPERSTARS
Congratulations to our students who were selected to be part of the AMADEUS Ensemble for our Region that performed at Sutherland Entertainment Centre this week. It is an amazing accomplishment and we are all very proud of each of them.
Well done to Liam C, Joshua G, Toby P and James S.
LOST HATS AND JACKETS
Just a reminder to PLEASE write your child's name CLEARLY on every item of their clothing, including hats and jackets. By doing this there is a greater chance that the item will be returned.
Can I also ask all parents / carers to CHECK that the hat / jacket your child brings home is actually theirs? Often the children can pick up a hat that belongs to someone else.
SCHOOL UNIFORM NEWS FROM YERONGA
- Boys Shirts (New) in store early October ( Yeronga Plain No Logo) available if required
- Summer Dress - ( Yeronga ) product mid Late October
- Boys Shorts – Available
- Sport Shirt Polo – previous version all sizes in stock – New Version delivery Mid November
Sport Short/ Skort In production ETA: within 3 weeks
Kind regards,
Steve Darcy (Principal)