I know I can write a lot, so I asked Gemini to summarise the text, it calleed it the Bottom Line:

The Bottom Line: Growth occurs in the "chaos" of experiences like school camps and family holidays. By naming emotions and focusing on collective skills rather than individual demands, we help children transition from self-centeredness to being part of a supportive "village."

Full Article!

Today, we welcome back our Camp students after another successful, yet tiring experience. I have put a little reflection into this newsletter about the importance of Camps and a little bit of chaos, as that's where memories are made and growth occurs. Too much is dysfunction, so it is always a balance! Thanks again to all the students and the teachers, it is huge!

I returned this week from a week in Fiji with my family. Having a Fijian Grandmother, it is always a reminder to me of the importance of the village, how a whole community raises children and how when we think of 'we', nothing is impossible.

It comes off the back of School Holidays, which as I know, are not holidays for parents. What is important is that we keep in check what can be achieved in these times....not every time, but they present so often. The challenge is conflict, particularly with siblings.

Sometimes we have a view that all conflict is bad. It is not, in fact we want our children to learn to stand their ground. As adults, we must learn to hold our own to ensure we are treated fairly, and in turn, treat others fairly whilst holding people accountable.

The challenge is we often wait until big things erupt and then try and deal with then. It is not possible to learn anything when this point is reached.

The key is to recognise, validate and teach emotions. It is also critical to see the skills behind the behaviour. Most conflict occurs from a focus on the self, looking at me. The key is to build on the 'we'. Talking to some locals in Fiji and Covid times when no tourism hurt their economy, they found comfort and support into going back to traditions, of caring for one another and sharing resources such as food.

We had a good example on our holiday. When we eat out, we normally try to keep to 45 minutes. We travelled with other adults who enjoy entree, main and desert. We had great challenges at the dinner table, but our expectation that children of age 4 and 5 would sit perfectly at a dinner for two hours was too big of a stretch. Therefore, we had to navigate the emotions that came with that, and yes eventually resorted to a phone. The opportunity is to look through the child's eye. They are often fed first, so then sit on uncomfortable chairs, in noisy places and are asked to sit and generally remain quiet, or talk about things they generally aren't interested in. If we were asked to sit on an uncomfortable chair, for a long stretch, listening to conversation that didn't involve us, we would struggle to, probably feeling bored, anxious, frustrated and tired. If we can give children this language around emotions, we can talk through the experience more effectively.

If children are fighting over a game, it is generally because they want their way. The opportunity is to name the skill required, taking turns before we start, then praise when they take a turn with support at the start. Many adults, including myself, struggle with this at busy times, therefore we need to understand children will mess it us and have conflict. They must in time see we are better if we have shared experiences, we belong, than simply doing it by myself. We are better in a village! If we can name the emotion, focus on the skill, over time we can really start to see a difference. But one time is not enough, one week, no where close, real growth takes time and unfortunately, conflict! The kicker, we can only help our kids navigate conflict if we are calm ourselves, and I know with my kids and their school holiday or weekend experience, I fail at this at times. I am human, and that is ok, as long as I show my kids that I am working on being calm. They will 'catch the calm.'

In a world full of conflict at the moment, we must try to change our own world, our house, our school and our community to find greater unity. It is what Pope Leo is calling for, to see each other as people who are more alike that difference. I'll leave you with this Prayer.

Prayer for unity from Pope Leo:

Lord Jesus Christ, You prayed that all may be one, as You are one with the Father and the Holy Spirit. In You, we find our unity; through You, we are made whole.

Heal the wounds of division, between nations, between neighbors, within our own hearts. Break down the walls that keep us apart, and build among us bridges of mercy, compassion, and peace.

Lord of At-One-Ment, make us instruments of Your reconciling love. Strengthen our spirit of humility and joy, that we may welcome all, serve the broken, and bear witness that in the one Christ, we are one.

Gather us, O Shepherd of souls, into one fold where none are lost, where every tear is wiped away, and where Your glory is our everlasting song.

Amen.

Important:

Please see the important dates:

Friday 8th May 8:50am: Mother's Morning - free Coffee, Tea and Sweets. Visit you childs class.

Wednesday 20th May: School Photos - order online.

Help Holy Family Grow