Wellbeing
Let’s Talk About Perfectionism
Hey there! Let’s chat about something that a lot of us deal with: perfectionism. You might have heard people say that being a perfectionist is a good thing because it means you want to succeed. But here’s the truth: perfectionism is different from just having high standards or working hard. It’s not the same as wanting to do your best or trying to grow and achieve your goals. Perfectionism can actually be really stressful and can make you feel bad about yourself, leading to anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues. People who are perfectionists often feel like they’re never good enough, criticize themselves a lot, and are super scared of failing.
Perfectionism can show up in all parts of your life or just in certain areas. Some common places where people struggle with perfectionism are school, work, relationships, sports, body image, hygiene, and even how they talk and write.
Are You a Perfectionist or a High Achiever?
So, how can you tell if you’re a perfectionist or just someone who aims high? Think about how much it affects you. Working hard to be your best is tough and sometimes stressful, but it shouldn’t make you feel completely overwhelmed.
Signs You Might Be a Perfectionist:
- You don’t start tasks unless you’re sure you can do them perfectly, or you procrastinate because of this.
- You care more about the final product than the process, experience, or learning.
- You struggle to finish something unless it’s perfect by your standards.
- You spend way too much time on tasks that others finish quickly
- You’re never satisfied with your achievements and always want more.
- You see anything less than perfect as a failure.
- You compare yourself unrealistically to others.
- How to Deal with Perfectionism
If you think you might be a perfectionist, don’t worry! Here are some tips to help you out:
Notice Your Perfectionism
The first step is to notice when you’re being a perfectionist. Take a moment to think about your thoughts and expectations. Are they fair and realistic? Would you hold your friends to the same standards, or are you harder on yourself? Write down your thoughts and reflect on them. You can even talk to someone you trust about how you’re feeling. Sometimes, just recognising that you’re being too hard on yourself can help you start to change.
Focus on the Good Stuff
Perfectionists tend to focus on the negatives, but it’s important to see the positives too. Make a conscious effort to recognise the good things about yourself and your work. Try to think of three things you’re proud of or appreciate about yourself every day. Maybe you helped a friend, did well on a test, or even just made it through a tough day. Celebrating small victories can help you see that you’re doing great, even if everything isn’t perfect.
Embrace Mistakes
Everyone makes mistakes – it’s part of being human! Mistakes help us grow and learn. When you mess up, try to see it as a learning opportunity instead of a failure. Practice doing things where you know you might not be perfect right away, like trying a new hobby or sport. You’ll realise that making mistakes isn’t the end of the world and can actually be fun and a great way to improve.
Set Realistic Goals
Perfectionists often set impossible goals, which can lead to failure and stress. Instead, try setting SMART goals. This means your goals should be:
Specific: Clearly define what you want to achieve.
Measurable: Make sure you can track your progress.
Achievable: Set goals that are realistic and within your reach.
Relevant: Choose goals that matter to you and your growth.
Time-bound: Set a deadline to keep yourself on track.
For example, instead of saying, “I want to get perfect grades,” you might say, “I want to improve my math grade by studying for an extra hour each week for the next month.” This way, you can challenge yourself without getting overwhelmed, and you’ll feel good about your progress.
Take Breaks and Practice Self-Care
Perfectionists can often overwork themselves, thinking they need to keep going non-stop to achieve their goals. But taking breaks and practicing self-care is super important. Make sure you get enough sleep, eat well, exercise, and spend time doing things you enjoy. Relaxing and taking care of your mental health can actually make you more productive and happier in the long run.
Talk to Someone
Sometimes, it helps to talk to someone about what you’re going through. Whether it’s a friend, family member, teacher, or counsellor, sharing your thoughts and feelings can provide support and new perspectives. They can help you see things differently and offer advice on how to manage your perfectionism.
Remember, it’s okay not to be perfect. Everyone has flaws and makes mistakes – that’s what makes us human! Focus on doing your best and being kind to yourself. You’ve got this!
Youth Support Services
headspace: visit headspace.org.au to find your nearest centre or call headspace on
1800 650 890.
Kids Helpline:
1800 55 1800 or kidshelpline.com.au
ReachOut: reachout.com.au
SANE Australia: 1800 187 263 or sane.org
National 24/7 crisis services
Lifeline:13 11 14 or lifeline.org.au
EACH Community Health: 1300 003 224
Knox Youth Services: 9298 8469
Suicide Call Back Service: 1300 659 467 or suicidecallbackservice.org.au
beyondblue:
1300 224 636 or beyondblue.org.au
Student Wellbeing Team
Email: wellbeing@wantirnacollege.vic.edu.au
Ashleigh Bibby - Leader of Wellbeing
Guiseppe Relia – Wellbeing Counsellor
Talea-Jane Simpson – Wellbeing Counsellor
Sanela Avdic - Wellbeing Counsellor
Lea Marrison - Mental Health Practitioner
Tajinder Wulff - Mental Health Practitioner
Katrina Gyngell - Mental Health Practitioner