Counselling Suite

R U OK?

This week, the Prefects organised for me to speak to the Year 12s about mental health, managing stress, identifying warning signs and talking to peers who we are concerned about.  If your child is displaying any of the following behaviours, then it may be time to start the R U OK? conversation at home:

• Disengagement in class
• Increased physical complaints (i.e. headaches, stomach aches, fatigue)
• Poor attendance
• Social withdrawal/isolation
• Decreased interest or participation in activities once enjoyed
• Difficulties concentrating/paying attention
• Spending excessive amounts of time in room alone/online/gaming
• Changes in sleeping, eating or exercise routines
• Decline in personal hygiene/ presentation
• Increase in risk taking behaviours
• Increase in self-destructive behaviours including substance abuse
• Changes in social media habits (less/more active)
• Changes in mood (increased anger/ irritability, flatness, crying more than usual, nervousness or over-bright)
• Feelings of hopelessness or no plans for future
• Thinking/talking about self-harm or suicide

Even if your child is not displaying the signs listed above, it is still helpful to check in with them regularly, as some people are very good at masking their issues.  Trust your intuition – if you sense that something is not right, then there’s a good chance that it’s not. 

Sometimes, it can be intimidating starting the R U OK? conversation.  It is important to remember that as long as it’s coming from a place of care or concern, there is no wrong way of asking your child about their mental health.  Nothing that you say to someone can make them do something.  Here are some tips that might help you to start this conversation at home:

• Be genuine
• Actively listen
• Be non-judgmental
• Show empathy – put yourself in their shoes
• Try not to over-react to things they say (even if you are shocked)
• Choose an appropriate time to ask them (i.e. not if they are on their way to a social event or busy doing work)
• Encourage your child to problem solve and assist them in this process

If you have the R U OK? conversation and think that your child might benefit from counselling support, talk to them about this option.  You can then refer your child to the student counselling service by emailing the referral form on Seqta to counselling@bps.sa.edu.au

Dr Lucinda Clifford

PSYCHOLOGIST