Chaplain's Chat

This week

Friendship is an issue regularly discussed in my office, with students, parents and even staff! Relationship breakdown, difficulties with friends and family and playground politics! We are made to be in relationship with one another, we need other people to survive. We won’t get far in life without the care, companionship and support of others. Some of us need lots of friends; others of us are content with a few. And that includes our children as well! They just might be happy playing on their own at times.

Our children need to be taught how to be a good friend. Although we’re hardwired to rely on others, we need to be taught the skills of friendship – through our own role modelling as parents as well as talking about the ‘how’ and ‘what’ of friendship. For example, saying ‘please’ and ‘thankyou’, taking turns when playing a game, letting others go before us, sharing, using our words, giving people their personal space, not hitting or punching others, not saying nasty things about others or speaking behind their backs. I often use storybooks as a tool to help children understand friendship, including one of my favourites, How to lose all your friends! by Nancy Carlson. Have a listen!

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kL4arYstzlo

Remember, sometimes friendships take work. They don’t just happen. We also make mistakes so need to say sorry, and perhaps even change our ways. Friendships can then grow, deepen and mature. There is something quite special about having a good, lifelong friend, who has been through our ups and downs and journeyed with us through the years.