Cyber Bullying

Young people especially students are now using technology and digital devices both in and out of school, from smartphones and laptops to text messages and social media. While this grants them more resources and efficiency in terms of searching for information, this also means that they are at risk of being a victim of cyber bullying or becoming cyber bullies themselves.

A recent newspaper article reported that one in five children are victims of cyber bullying. This is a significant number that as a community we shouldn’t ignore. Parents are usually the first line of defence for our young people and, as a parent, there are many constructive things you can do to protect them from the dangers of cyber bullying.

What Is Cyber Bullying?

Cyber bullying happens when someone uses technology to offend or harass someone. This includes using digital and online services such as email, text messages, and social media—all of which today’s students and teens are using more and more for studying, socialising, and entertainment. Not only are young people at risk of being victims of online bullies, they could also unwittingly become cyber bullies themselves, which could have serious implications on their reputation, social interactions, and future plans.

How Parents Can Help

Some forms of cyber bullying are obvious, such as when someone contributes to unkind online gossip or posts images that are solely meant to hurt or upset someone. Other examples of cyber bullying are less apparent. For example, repeatedly sending unwanted messages and behaving in a way that could be construed as stalking or creating a fake social media profile in someone’s name and using that profile to post offensive material.

As parents know their children better than anyone, they represent valuable potential when it comes to preventing the proliferation of cyber bullying. Below are key insights to help you get parents started if not already across this growing issue.

Communicate with Your Kids

Talk to your children and gain their trust. This means using language they understand so they are clear about what is right and wrong. Don’t assume they understand all technical jargon. Make sure they know what to look out for and that they feel comfortable in coming to you if they are subjected to content which could be upsetting or offensive. Keep reminding them about what to be aware of and ask them open-ended questions so you know how they are feeling. Also remember to be patient, as children tend to ask questions—this is actually a good sign which shows that they are open to communication. Be honest and up front, contextualise the conversation in the fact that they will soon be adults and in the workplace and in society, bullying of any form is illegal.

Set a Good Example

Encourage them to post positive or empowering content on social media by setting a good example. Explain what harm they can do by posting content that is offensive or upsetting. Share stories with them about what you’ve found to be offensive and talk to them about cyber bullying in the news, so they know these things happen and that they can do something to deal with it and be positive examples themselves.

Keep an Eye on Their Internet Use

Older children don’t want parents reading every message they send and, usually, parents want to respect their privacy as well. However, you can have an open-door policy at home, so you can see at a glance what sites and social media platforms your kids are using and who they are talking to. If children use computers and smartphones in the family living area, it will be even easier to keep an eye on them without having to actually impose on their personal space.

Be Aware That They Can Become the Bully

Peer pressure and wanting to look popular in front of their friends may result in children and students posting inappropriate content or sending hurtful messages. This is something that parents should consider—being aware of this truth helps puts things into perspective when it comes to cyber bullying prevention. Knowing they can become cyber bullies means you are aware that you also have to prevent them from sending offensive content.

For older children and students, you can tell them that Australia has laws pertaining to serious online harassment and bullying. The maximum penalty for adults is three years imprisonment or a fine of more than $30,000. There are also heavy penalties for persistent online stalking where a person is made to feel scared, offended, or harassed.

Educate Yourself

Education and awareness are the first steps in any campaign to stop bullying, online or offline. How can parents help their kids if they don’t know what the symptoms of cyber bullying are, and the tools or avenues used to spread it? A recent report on Cyber Bullying indicated that 96% of parents say they need additional online safety information to help them manage the risks of cyber bullying. Educating yourself and staying abreast of current techniques, technologies, and strategies that online bullies use is key for parents, often children can share this information with their parents and help educate them as part of a family strategy to protect all young people in the home from cyber bullying. Doing so keeps you aware of what to look out for in terms of cyber bullying trends, keeping you prepared and informed.

Don’t Wait

If you have any suspicions, act fast. Find out the facts and speak to the school so you can take steps and work together to protect your children from harm. You can report cases of cyber bullying to the Office of the eSafety Commissioner and they will work to get the bullying material removed.

Set up Parental Controls

For younger children, you can monitor what your children do online with parental controls  (which are packaged with many digital devices and services such as web browsers and anti-virus software) and using a child internet monitoring tool for parents. When needed, you can also use these to limit the types of content your children view online, protecting them from viewing potentially harmful material.

When it comes to dealing with cyber bullying, parents, teachers, and students all have a role to play. Cyber bullying is real and must not be ignored. Need convincing? Just take a look at its ill-effects on the victims. Cyber bullying can impact everything from a victim’s performance in school to long-term mental health.

Cyber Bullying Decreases School Performance

There’s a good chance that both those who are victims of cyber bullying and those who bully others online perform poorly at school. We can see evidence of this in one of the studies coming out of the USA. The study found that victims began producing worse grades than usual after the bullying started. One of the reasons for this could be the anxious feelings that come with being a victim of online bullying. Unfortunately, if poor performance continues for victims, it could have a negative impact on their future. With a reported 20% of Australian young people experiencing cyber bullying in Australia, that’s a lot of students whose futures could eventually suffer.

An Increased Risk of Self-harm and Suicide

Although it’s easy to assume that cyber bullying is somehow less harmful than face-to-face or physical bullying, there’s a lot of evidence that says it may be actually worse. In Australia, research has revealed how children who are victims of cyber bullying are more likely to consider suicide than those who are bullied in the classroom. Naturally, this is concerning for any parent or teacher. While it isn’t always possible to see everything a child is doing online, it is possible to prevent some of its harmful consequences. Positive actions such as using a cyberbullying safety tool in Australia allow parents to tackle incidents of online harassment better.

Low Self-esteem

According to Australian Government, cyber bullying is most likely to happen in years five and eight. Sadly, these are also the years they are experiencing a period in their lives that’s already confusing, being exposed to online harassment can lead to low self-esteem. Findings show that children whose parents and teachers try to stop bullying while using positive coping mechanisms can resolve self-esteem issues. They’re able to achieve this by learning how to cope with the bullying from someone they look up to. As such, it’s essential that teachers and parents work together to support children who experience bullying online.

Spending More Time Alone

Unlike adults, many children don’t have the right coping skills for managing bullying. Depending on their age, they may choose to lash out, seek help, or withdraw from their friends and family. Some might experience a sense of shame that prevents them from seeking help. Or, they may fear the consequences or speaking out or standing up to the bully.

To avoid discussing the problem, they might even choose to spend more time alone, stunting their social skills in the process. According to statistics, around 52% of young people being bullied will seek help. What about the remaining 48%? It’s simply too large a cohort of young people that we can’t and must not ignore or even worse, pretend it is