Weekly Wellbeing 

Emotional Basics

Name it to Tame it

This simple and powerful tool is Emotional Intelligence 101.  Dan Siegel, leading psychiatrist and parenting expert coined the term and there is research that backs the premise.  Naming the emotion you are feeling (preferably out load) allows you access to the ‘thinking part’ of the brain where you can be rational and responsive.  It doesn’t even matter of you don’t know the exact emotion you are feeling, getting it in the ballpark will do the trick.  Try it for yourself and see how powerful it is. 

See Dan Siegel explaining the tool and how to use it in your parenting.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gm9CIJ74Oxw

All you need to help your child develop the skill is to role model it:  for example, you might say to your child, "I am feeling really irritated right now" and pause to notice how that feels in your body.  The other thing you need is an emotions list or chart on your fridge (see the monkeys below) so your young person can point to an emotion even if they can’t name it.  

Don’t correct them if you think they have picked wrong….it doesn’t matter…then get them to say it out loud,  e.g. "I feel angry".

Naming tames the uncomfortable emotions and enhances the positive so it works for all emotions.  We need to learn to accept all of our emotions.  Suppression and denial of uncomfortable emotions is detrimental to our wellbeing. 

Here is a comprehensive but worth reading document on Emotion Coaching

Here is a podcast on connecting emotionally with your child with Sophie Havighurst

Here is a list of emotions you can print off and laminate and put on your fridge. 

Happy Taming!

Julie & Mia  -  Student Wellbeing