eSmart
ACT eSmart - Ask, Check, Think
ACT eSafe
No parental control tool is 100% effective.
Helping your child build good online safety habits is just as important.
HELPING YOUNG PEOPLE EXPOSED TO UPSETTING CONTENT
Before young people start using technology, it’s crucial you talk to them about the type of things they might see online and develop strategies on how to deal with upsetting content. Your child may find things they never intended to look at so talking regularly about their online activities and encouraging them to come to you is one of the best conversations you can have. If your child has been exposed to upsetting content it can hard to know how to help. Netsafe has developed the following advice to guide you through this difficult situation.
WHAT TO DO IF A YOUNG PERSON IS EXPOSED TO UPSETTING CONTENT
If a young person comes to you about something they have seen online, the most important thing you can do is take what they are saying seriously. The other things to do are:
- Try not to assign blame about how they came across the material
- Reassure them that it isn’t their fault
- Don’t trivialise what they have seen by saying that the material may not be real (it is important to deal with their feelings first)
- Provide comfort and assurance
- Normalise their response, e.g., ‘It’s normal to be scared/angry/upset/confused’
- Don’t overreact by taking away the technology – this will make them less likely to talk to you if something else happens and it can make them feel like they are to blame
- Make sure that they know you are glad that they came to you about it.
It’s important to seek professional help for your child if intense feelings or behaviours persist.
HOW TO PREVENT EXPOSURE TO UPSETTING CONTENT
One of the best strategies is to talk with your family regularly about online risks and how to avoid them as well as encouraging young people to discuss things that disturb them.
It’s important to keep an open line of communication about what they do. Talking with your child about their experiences from the first time they go online can be helpful in keeping the lines of communication open for when something disturbs them. When you talk with them about school, friends or sport remember to ask about their online lives and friends too.
While there is a place in young peoples’ lives for filtering tools, as they develop they will want their freedom and privacy. It is quite easy to get around filtering or to use a computer, phone or games console to get online either at home or away from home (at school, at a friend’s house or at the library) which is why education remains the most important thing you can do.
HOW TO TALK TO YOUNG PEOPLE ABOUT UPSETTING CONTENT
Once a young person has stopped feeling upset, it can be helpful to provide context for what they have seen. You might like to start by discussing the content of what was viewed, whether it was real or not and how it may have been accessed.
The discussion is important even if their attitude is one of ‘no big deal’ at the time. This will help them understand how the material was made, whether it was real, how the material fits with your family values and provides them with a chance to ask questions.