Pastoral Care

Teaching Students to Understand Stress - by Michael Herbert

“I am stressed” can be the response of some young people when dealing with the challenges of daily life. There are a few thoughts we should consider if we truly want to be helpful to a ‘stressed’ young person. For young people, life comes down to two things, growing and learning - both are demanding because they require young people to explore and move beyond the familiar limits of their comfort zone.

Before we go any further, a clarification: Chronic or traumatic stress are genuine medical conditions and must never be dismissed or trivialised. We should always be respectful of the stress experienced by a young person and it is never our role to diagnose or judge stress or anxiety. Professional advice is essential when a pattern of stress can be identified.

Being stressed is not the same as chronic or traumatic stress.

Preparing for an exam can be stressful as can the need to juggle a number of assignments or balancing school/sport/part-time work/family and social obligations. This type of stress is usually temporary (it is what happens in life) and is about the skills we need to develop in order to face the new challenges that life throws at us. 

Stressful situations usually have ‘triggers’.

We can teach young people to identify and manage many of the triggers of their stress. These triggers are often related to specific behaviours (e.g. lack of sleep, toxic relationships, potentially addictive behaviours, all work, no play, or in some cases, too much play, not enough work). Young people appreciate clear guidance about how to change the behaviours that trigger the problems associated with feeling stressed.

Often it is the thinking that causes the problem.

Stress is usually more about the way we are thinking and less about the load we are experiencing. Learning to understand how they are thinking is particularly helpful for young people who are constantly confronting new experiences that are stretching them in ways that have never been stretched before. When looked upon positively, these experiences help to develop both resilience and mastery. This is why it is very important for adults to resist the urge to rescue young people from situations that are stressful.

Stress responses can become a habit.

It is good to ask a young person: Are you reacting the same way this time as you did previous times you have felt overwhelmed? We can help by teaching new ways to understand and then respond to the feelings they call ‘stress’; in other words, find ways to change what is becoming a habitual response. 

The Positive News: A stress response can be very helpful.

There is enough research to prove that a stress response can put the brain and body in a favourable position to perform. Studies show that individuals with a stress‐is‐enhancing outlook outperform those with a stress‐is‐debilitating attitude.

More information on this topic can be found at: https://www.vitalstaff.com.au/

The Pastoral Care Team