Student Wellbeing

From the Coordinator of Counselling and Student Health 

Talking to your Child about War and Conflict 

Discussing war and conflict with your child is necessary due to the interconnected world we live in. The 24-hour news cycle and social media can result in distressing information and images being spread quickly. Parents and guardians play a pivotal role in helping their child navigate this complex issue. Having conversations with your child will not only to educate them about the realities of war and conflict, but will also instill values of empathy, tolerance, and critical thinking. Tailor conversations to your child's stage of development and emotional maturity. Younger children benefit from simplified explanations focusing on peace and cooperation, while older children can delve into historical events, causes of conflict, and the complexities of international relations. Before discussing these topics with your child, it is important to assess your own emotions and comfort level. By staying calm and providing physical comfort, you will help your child regulate their own emotions. In challenging times, compassionate adults play a crucial role in helping their child cope, as well as providing them with hope and an understanding of our complex world. 

The following tips from UNICEF provide a guide on how to approach conversations with your child in a supportive manner. Please see: https://www.unicef.org/parenting/how-talk-your-children-about-conflict-and-war for more detail. 

Find out what they know and how they feel.

Choose a natural time to bring up the discussion such as at the dinner table or when travelling in the car. A good starting point is to ask what your child already knows and how they feel about it. 

Keep it calm and age appropriate. 

It is important that children are aware of what is going on in the world, but that you ensure the information shared and language used is appropriate to their stage of development. Try not to overshare and be mindful of your own emotions during conversations.

Spread compassion, not stigma. 

War and conflict can bring prejudice and discrimination into the community. Avoid labels and overgeneralisations. Instead use it as an opportunity for empathy, particularly for those that have lost their homes or have lost loved ones.

Focus on the helpers.

Children need to know that people are helping each other with acts of bravery and compassion. Talk about first responders and those providing aide.

End the conversation with care. 

It is important that the conversation does not end with your child in a distressed state. Assess where they are at and remind them that they can talk to you if they want to discuss things further or are feeling worried. 

Continue to check in. 

Check in with your child periodically to see how they are doing and be ready to talk to your child further should they bring up the subject again.

Limit the flood of news. 

Be aware of how much your child is exposed to on the news and through social media. Also be mindful of any adult conversations they may overhear.

Take care of yourself 

Children will be guided by your responses and reactions. If you are feeling upset, take time for yourself and reach out for support. Also be aware of how much you are looking at the news and balance this with lighter, positive moments within your day. 

Further information on this topic can also be viewed at:

School TV 

https://pittwaterhouse.schooltv.me/wellbeing_news/special-report-discussing-war-conflict 

Emerging Minds 

https://emergingminds.com.au/resources/how-to-talk-to-children-about-war-and-conflict/ 

Beacon House 

https://beaconhouse.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/03/Talking-to-children-about-war-and-conflict.pdf