From our Counsellors 

Finding Closure and Moving Forward

As the end of the year approaches, we are providing opportunities for the community to foster a sense of closure. When processing an ending and change like the one we are all soon to face, it is important to practise acceptance, allow ourselves to process and express our feelings, and place the experience in context so we can move forward. While the change is out of our control, we can focus on the learning, fun, meaning, connections, and growth that Shelford has given us and that we can carry forward. 

“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.”  

Allowing our natural and difficult emotions to be felt and expressing them in some way is beneficial when we experience endings – whether it be through talking, crying, writing, drawing, creating, or movement. We cannot selectively numb emotions – to feel the gratitude, connection, and joy in these final weeks, we also need to be open to sense of sadness and loss that may come with them.  

Some strategies that can help with finding closure are:  

• contain the experience: write it out and put it in an envelope, create a box of reminders (written thoughts, memories, items), use your intuition and creativity to symbolise the experience and its ending  
• feel the feels: notice, accept, and express the range of emotions in your own time and your own way (e.g., sadness, grief, disappointment, uncertainty, optimism, curiosity, etc.) – there’s no right or wrong  
• surround yourself with people who can support and encourage you  
• gather your internal resources: focus on your strengths, the positives, what you can control, and what you need 

These final days are about finding the balance between recognising the learnings and memories we can take with us, making the most of the present experiences, and looking to future opportunities and growth.  

Moving forward 

Moving forward is not about forgetting or denying an experience or memories – it is about considering what we have learned and how we can carry it forward. It is important to accept the normal range of emotions we may feel – from sadness to serenity, excitement to emptiness, gratitude to grief, nostalgia to nervousness. We encourage the whole school community to be honest about the impact Shelford has had on their identity and life overall – in this way, the experience at Shelford can become a chapter in each of our unique life stories. 

Respect – Integrity – Passion - Creativity 

As we all move forward to new schools and communities, may we honour our dear Shelford by living by its teachings and values.   

It has been an honour and privilege to support the wellbeing of Shelford students and to be part of this wonderful community.  

We wish you all the best for the next chapter.   

Edith Benardeau-Short

Psychologist

Charlotte Edmonds

Counsellor