FPS Newsletter

Every Body is Different & That's Okay

Wellbeing Update

Promoting a Positive Body Image

Wellbeing leaders are often approached by parents, students and teachers about issues of concern to families or the community. Recent conversations have raised a number of concerns about disordered eating, negative body image and unkind comments about appearance for students.

 

Appearance teasing and bullying can include:

  • Facial features - nose, eyes, ears, facial hair
  • Colourings – skin/hair colour
  • Body size – weight, height, muscularity, physical maturation
  • Complexion – pimples, freckles, birthmarks

 

A recent informal survey of FPS students revealed that 50% of those who responded had overheard or experienced negative comments about their appearance or that of others.

‘I heard someone call someone else fat.’
‘Some kids say I’m short’
‘Someone once said I had a big chest.’
‘People make comments about my thick eyebrows and say girls shouldn’t have a moustache.’
‘Someone said to me, “You’re so short.”’
‘Lots of people notice and comment on the birth mark on my face.’
‘Someone has called me fat.’
‘Someone called me flat chested.’
‘I have a big freckle on my nose and people ask me why I don’t get it removed.’

 

Many students are aware of the influence of social media and the media in general in building appearance and body ideals. During a recent discussion, students noted:

‘Lots of people use filters to make themselves look better in photos.’
‘You can make your body look skinnier or take away wrinkles and people think that’s what you really look like.’
‘When you see those pictures all the time on ads and billboards you think that is what everyone is supposed to look like.’
But several heads nodded quietly when one student said, “When I look in the mirror I feel disappointed”.

 

As parents, we can support our children to be kind to their unique and wonderful bodies, to learn to accept that there is no ‘normal’ therefore no ‘not normal’ and that their body and appearance is a part of them – but not all of them.

 

We can help by flipping these attitudes:

  • That thinner/more muscular is better.
  • That our body measurements define us.
  • That it’s OK to judge or make body/appearance comparisons.

 

What you can do to support your children:

  • Strive to be healthy and active rather than thin/muscular/lean.
  • Participate in physical activity for fun rather than to manage your weight or shape.
  • Challenge language, dialogue and messaging that reaffirms body or appearance ideals.

 

We can be the role models by:

  • Speaking kindly about other people’s bodies and appearances.
  • Celebrating ourselves and others for more than how we look. Your appearance does not define your worth.
  • Respecting that every body is unique and different. There isn’t a right or wrong way to be.
  • Complimenting others for the stuff that’s on the inside. We are so much more than a body.
  • Use words carefully. Build people up, not tear them down.

 

Encourage your child to:

  • Nourish their bodies during recess and lunch. All bodies need fuel to perform physically and mentally.
  • Move their bodies in ways that are fun, and help their mind and body to feel good.
  • Talk about how moving your body releases endorphins or “feel good” chemicals that helps relieve stress and anxiety, which is why many people exercise.
  • Understand that no body is perfect, and that’s okay.
  • Talk about their feelings and ask for help if they are finding it tough.

 

Help your child know what to do if they hear someone use unkind descriptors of others' appearances:

  • Don’t laugh or join in.
  • Say ‘That’s really not OK’.
  • Ask the person ‘Are you OK?’.
  • Let the person know you’re there for them and include them when you can.

 

If your child experiences these comments, they can:

  • Say ‘I don’t need your opinion.’
  • Say ‘I like my …’
  • Say ‘My body isn’t up for discussion’.
  • Say ‘I’m out of here’.
  • Offer no reaction.
  • Share what they have experienced with someone they trust.

 

Books you can read to/with your child/ren:

  • Bodies are Cool, by Tyler Feder
  • All Bodies are Wonderful, by Beth Cox
  • All Bodies are Good Bodies, by Charlotte Barkla
  • Her Body Can, by Katie Crenshaw
  • Love your Body, by Jessica Sanders
  • Embrace Your Body, by Taryn Brumfitt

 

Some further information can be found at:

~ Cathy Turner, Disability Inclusion & Wellbeing Leading Teacher