Chaplains Corner

“ Not long to go until the end of school now! Some of you probably know how many sleeps until Christmas! 

This next tip on helping children seems to go against the grain as we want to help  and “rescue” but this type of approach really build self esteem. If I could go back to when my kids were little I’d do more of this….

7. Avoid avoiding everything that causes anxiety

Do your children want to avoid social events, dogs, school, planes or basically any situation that causes anxiety? As a parent, do you help them do so? Of course! This is natural.

The flight part of the flight-fight-freeze response urges your children to escape the threatening situation. Unfortunately, in the long run, avoidance makes anxiety worse.

So what’s the alternative? Try a method we call laddering. Kids who are able to manage their worry break it down into manageable chunks. Laddering uses this chunking concept and gradual exposure to reach a goal.

Let’s say your child is afraid of sitting on the swings in the park. Instead of avoiding this activity, create mini-goals to get closer to the bigger goal (e.g. go to the edge of the park, then walk into the park, go to the swings, and, finally, get on a swing).

You can use each step until the exposure becomes too easy; that’s when you know it’s time to move to the next rung on the ladder.”

Kind regards

Katharine