Principal's Message

Dear Parents,

Have a guess as to the title of this verse:

“Sometimes in life it’s hard to tell, what we should or should not do.

Just because my friends do something,

Does that mean I should do it too?

I want so much to be accepted, I want so bad to just fit in,

Should I join in and just follow the crowd,

Although, what they do might be a sin?”

If you guessed “Peer Pressure”, you were spot-on; the author was a young adult named Calvin Hart. 

Peer pressure can start when we are two years old and continue well into our twilight years, but it does seem to have its most intense influence during the adolescent years.

This is the time when our children are striking out on their own and trying to identify who they really are. Childhood guidance and rules no longer suit their needs. They might try to give the impression that they can now stand on their own two feet, but those legs above their feet are rather shaky and they need us to be there for them as never before. 

Facing peer pressure is a natural part of growing up and whether or not our children give in to its negative aspects, will have a lot to do with the kind of relationship they share with us, their parents. Establishing a good relationship will take time and so needs to be commenced when our children are infants. The pillar of our relationship should be the continued message to our children that they are always loved and accepted for who they are, no matter what. The forging of a bond with our children that will make them feel loved and accepted for who they are, will give them a sense of security. This security will give them the strength to stand up for their values and beliefs. 

Our children’s beliefs about certain things may be different from ours, because the world has moved on since we were young. We need to allow them their beliefs and respect them even if they appear to be not well informed. We can encourage them to stand up for what they believe in and so let them know that their opinions matter. We might not always be in agreement but we can provide them with the opportunity to share their opinions, and so let our children know they have an unconditional support system. 

From an early age, we should encourage our children to make their own decisions. We can guide them towards the right thing to do when dealing with a friend who is teasing, or what stance to take in a disagreement amongst peers, but the final decision should be theirs; accepting and dealing with any consequences should also be theirs. 

Young people want to make their own decisions and if they have good information, self-confidence and our love to back it up, they will mostly make the best choices. The more our children know about dangerous behaviours the less likely they will engage in them. Often, the reason adolescents take part in self-destructive behaviour, is because their friends glorify it and do not talk about the risks associated with it. If parents provide this information, children may be less inclined to adopt the poor behaviour of others. We need to keep building self esteem into our children. Good self esteem will help them realise that if another person does not respect them and tries to “ride right over them”, then, that person is not worthy of their friendship. 

Adolescence is a worrying time for parents, but if we always keep the lines of communication open, know when to give advice and when to just listen and be there for them, then our ride through this period can be on the “merry-go-round” rather than on the “ghost train”.

God Bless 

Leonie Burfield

Principal