How to encourage healthy friendships

As parents, we can relate to the challenges that can emerge when our children face difficulties with their friendships or experience clashes in personalities. We recognise that friends hold a central place in our children's lives. It's vital that we stand by their side through all the highs and lows. Encourage kids to reflect on what they value and what interests them, and how these align with the people or groups they interact with. Ask questions like:

"What's the main reason you want to be part of the group?"
"What compromises might you need to make? Are they worthwhile?"
"What would you do if someone in the group insisted you act unkind to other kids or do something you don't want to do?"
"When does playful teasing cross the line into hurtful bullying?"

Stay true to their interests. If your child has always enjoyed playing the piano but suddenly wants to quit because it's considered "uncool," discuss ways to address this. Encourage kids to engage in activities they genuinely enjoy and that help boost their self-confidence.

Embrace diverse social circles. Encourage kids to be friends with people they genuinely like and enjoy, regardless of their backgrounds, ages, and interests. Set an example by diversifying your own friendships and acquaintances.

Don't overly focus on whether your children are friends with the "right" kids or are part of the "right" groups. Prioritise nurturing meaningful friendships instead.

Speak up and take a stand. If they feel anxious or pressured due to group dynamics, encourage your kids to assert themselves and stand up for others who are excluded or bullied. Urge them not to participate in anything that feels wrong, be it a prank or gossiping about others.

Take responsibility for your actions. Promote sensitivity towards others and discourage mindlessly following a group. Remind kids that a true friend respects their opinions, interests, and choices, no matter how different they may be. Acknowledge that standing out can be challenging, but in the end, kids are accountable for their words and actions.

Consider the bigger picture. While kids are in a clique group it can be tough to deal with, remember that circumstances can change rapidly. What truly matters is forming genuine friendships – people they can confide in, share laughter with, and trust. The real key to being "popular" in the genuine sense is for them to be the type of friend they would like to have: respectful, fair, supportive, caring, trustworthy, and kind.

A wide range of literature and child-friendly books are available to assist in understanding friendships and social situations for kids of all ages. Many of these books can be found on our school library shelves, or you can explore your local library to see what they have to offer. Books provide an excellent pathway to address challenging topics because they shift the focus away from the child themselves, creating a safe space to discuss things that might be embarrassing or difficult to talk about.

You can read more about this on kidshealth.org

Transitions

This week, we welcomed our final two groups for their first Prep Orientation, and we couldn't be more thrilled to have all these little ones joining us next year! They were full of enthusiasm and seemed well-prepared for the journey ahead. We're looking forward to the two remaining Prep Orientation sessions. On November 20, we have our morning session with our new Preps and later that evening, our 2024 Prep Parent information session held onsite at school. Our final orientation session will be Friday, December 8. A big shoutout to our Prep team for their excellent preparation and warm welcome to our new families.

We have a Starting school Social Story you can access here to find out all about starting at St Finbar's.

Technology

We sent out a gentle reminder to our student community this week on being a responsible Cyber Citizen at St Finbar's. It might be a good idea to have a conversation with your child regarding their technology usage at home. This is a great opportunity to discuss an action plan with them, outlining what steps they should take if they encounter anything that makes them feel uncomfortable online.

It's essential to stay informed about the platforms our children are using and how these connections extend beyond the home. Even video games they might be playing often come with chat functions, which can expose them to potential risks.

Understanding the effect of screen time and how much screen time your child is having is also a key factor related to behaviour and learning. You can read up more on recommendations around screen time on the Raising Children website here.

Speaking of technology, we want to offer a huge congratulations to our Year 6 coding team for their outstanding performance at the Victorian Coding Challenge in Pascoe Vale this week. Mr Anderson noted the high level of difficulty, but that didn't deter them. They managed to secure a place in the top 10 out of 30 schools. Well done!

Thanks again for all your support,

Peggy McDonald & Steele Anderson

Deputy Principals

Parish Bulletin

Sunday 5th November, 2023