EMPOWERING STUDENT WELLNESS

GRIEF DOES NOT LEAVE US?

By Matt Edwards (Secondary Chaplain) 

Ugh... Why are we talking about grief?

Grief is as real as happiness. Maybe experienced less frequently, but something we will all feel at some point in our lives.

Australians are increasingly living with a sense that pain is bad. That it should be avoided at all costs! Yet we can create a big problem for ourselves if we approach the pain of grief with this mindset. To treat grief like an intruder, means that it will always be perceived to be one. But grief is more like having surgery. We receive help for our wounds. The pain stays for a while, and the scars rarely leave us. But a scar is proof of healing too. We need to feel the pain of loss. It is part of what makes us human beings and it means that we have loved, and often, that we have been loved.

And so, grief is not something to be rid of. The phrases, ‘move past it’, ‘put it behind me’, and even ‘work through it’, cannot suffice. Grief, more realistically, never leaves us. We carry the effects of loss, and how we respond to it, for the rest of our lives. It actually makes us part of who we are.

I don’t say this to suggest that it will always affect a person in the same way as it initially did. When grief first hits us, it can feel all encompassing and overwhelming. Like there is no area in our life that is not touched by it. This is a normal grief experience for people to have. But as time goes on, our life grows. As we keep interacting with others, and dealing with other things in life, we adapt in a way that allows us to keep living life while our grief is present. It can make us more empathetic and compassionate towards others.

Our kids grieve. The loss of friendships, loved ones, lost dreams, even rejection from others. Sometimes this can fill them with pain. And one thing that can help with pain that is present, is comfort that is present. It may not take away the pain, but it may take away its edge. For them to be seen with all of their pain, and still know that they belong and are loved, offers them what they need.

Grief is hard. But is gives the opportunity for our kids to see how deep our love for them goes. It doesn’t ‘fix’ it, but it supports them with it.

For more information on this topic, please see the following links: 

https://bhcs.vic.schooltv.me/node/7386 (Introduction to Grief) 3min

https://bhcs.vic.schooltv.me/content/blog/grief-helping-teens-grief

https://bhcs.vic.schooltv.me/newsletter-external-resource/10-ideas-about-children-grief 

GETTING TO KNOW OUR WELLBEING TEAM 

Keep an eye on this spot over the next editions and get to know our amazing wellbeing team!  This week we find out more about one of our Deputies, who oversees our wellbeing team! 

Liam Jarrott (Primary Chaplain)

General Background? 

Hi, my name is Liam. 

Some things you may not know about me is that I am 23 years old and one of 3 siblings, myself being the oldest. Just like many of you, I also did my schooling at a Christian School, before taking a gap year and then going to bible college for last 3 years. If I was to describe myself in 3 words, I would say I am fun, energetic and compassionate. 

When you were younger what did you want to be?

 When I was younger, I wanted to be professional basketballer. 

What was your first job or your most unusual job?

The first job I ever had was working in a cafe making cold drinks and toasties. 

What is your role and when did you commence at BHCS? 

I began my role at Belgrave Heights in the middle of Term 1 as the new Primary school chaplain. 

Best part about your job? 

The best part about my job is being able to get alongside all the young people at our school to see them succeed in all areas of life. Also the excursions are pretty cool too!!

Hobbies?

Some of my hobbies include watching a lot of sport, playing sport (particularly basketball) and catching up with mates for a coffee. 

When you think about Jesus, what comes to mind?

When I think about Jesus, I can't help but look to the Cross as a sign of the greatest and most selfless display of love that we have ever seen. 

What is your favorite Movie?

Shrek

Favourite Meal? 

Chicken Parma

Favourite holiday destination or place to visit?

Fiji or Lorne

What are you passionate about? 

I am super passionate about seeing people thrive to get the best out of themselves in all areas of life. As a Christian, I also am passionate about my relationship with Jesus. 

Life verse or motto:

2 Timothy 1:7 For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.