St James Student Wellbeing 

Wellbeing

Bullying

In continuation of our exploration of Digital Well-Being, it is essential to turn our attention to the pressing issue of Cyber Bullying. This is a concern that requires collective awareness, particularly as it pertains to our younger generation. Recent statistics from the eSafety Commissioner reveal an alarming surge in reports of severe cyberbullying incidents among individuals under 14 years old, with instances more than tripling since 2019.

Remarkably, the month of May 2023 marked a significant milestone in the realm of cyberbullying, recording the highest number of reported incidents since the inception of eSafety’s cyberbullying monitoring program back in July 2015.

Given these unsettling trends, it is imperative to engage in regular and open dialogues with our children regarding their online safety and how to respond when confronted with online hostility.

But first let us have a clear understanding of what bullying is:

Understanding Bullying:

To begin, let us establish a clear understanding of what constitutes bullying. Bullying occurs when a person consistently endeavours to inflict emotional harm upon another individual. It is crucial to differentiate between accidental harm and repeated hurtful behaviour, which serves as a key indicator of bullying.

"Bullying is defined as the persistent attempt to cause emotional distress to another person."

What are the kinds of bullying that can occur?

Previously I thought bullying is just picking on someone but there is more to it than that.

There are four kinds of bullying:

1. Verbal, which uses words
2. Physical, which uses touching.
3. Social, which excludes others
4. Cyber, which happens online.

It is the hidden bullying that can be most detrimental. Perhaps you can ask your child if they can think of examples of the four kinds of bullying listed above?

For girls, social bulling seems the weapon of choice. This can be very painful, because we all need to be loved, accepted and welcomed. Talking with girls and explaining how to notice someone trying to socially exclude others or control who interacts with who is a way to avoid this type of bullying. With this type of bullying being someone who notices it and names it and calls someone out on it is being an up stander. Sometimes it is hard for girls to call this out because they don’t want to be excluded themselves. But if they don’t stand up for others who will stand up for them?

For boys, verbal and physical seems to be the weapon of choice. This can be easier to deal with because it is more obvious. It can be handled quickly. Also children are quicker to call on the assistance of an adult to deal with it.

It is important to explain that a bully is really someone who lacks power and they seek to regain this power by perhaps doing what has been done to them or doing something negative to others so that they feel more powerful. But bullying is not good for them or others or the greater good. Often the bully is scared and finds negative behaviours can make them feel better. Perhaps ask your child if they can relate to being mean to someone in order to get even or feel more powerful over them.

Perhaps talk about times when your child felt pressured or saw someone else being pressured? How did they feel about that? What was so hard about it?

For adults bullying might not be an issue. But we can bully ourselves. It is important to take note of how we treat ourselves when we do something wrong or fail at something. Bullying self involves repeatedly putting self down for failures. Growing in patience with ourselves especially when times are tough is crucial for our well being. Perhaps a topic for another time.

For now I would like to finish with a list of different kinds of bullying found online, it might be worth looking over these with your child so they have some awareness of them:

Examples of Online Bullying:

Online bullying, also known as cyberbullying, involves using digital platforms to harass, intimidate, or harm others. There are many types of cyberbullying.

Here are some examples of online bullying:

Harassment: Sending repeated offensive messages, threats, or derogatory comments through social media, emails, or messaging apps.

Flaming: Engaging in heated and hostile arguments or debates online, often using aggressive language and personal attacks.

Doxxing: Sharing personal information, such as addresses, phone numbers, or private photos, with the intention of causing harm or encouraging others to harass the individual.

Impersonation: Creating fake profiles or accounts to impersonate someone and spread false information, rumors, or offensive content in their name.

Outing: Sharing someone's private and personal information, such as secrets, sexual orientation, or embarrassing details, without their consent.

Exclusion: Purposefully excluding someone from online groups, chats, or events, making them feel isolated and left out.

Cyberstalking: Consistently and obsessively monitoring someone's online activities, sending them threatening or intrusive messages, and causing them to feel unsafe.

Trolling: Posting inflammatory or offensive comments with the intent of provoking emotional reactions from others, often disrupting online discussions or communities.

Body Shaming: Criticizing someone's appearance, body size, or physical features in a hurtful and demeaning manner.

Hate Speech: Sharing content that promotes discrimination, racism, sexism, homophobia, or any form of prejudice and hatred towards a specific group of people.

Public Humiliation: Sharing embarrassing photos, videos, or personal stories of someone with the intention of ridiculing and humiliating them.

Fake Rumors: Spreading false rumors or fabricated stories about someone to damage their reputation and credibility.

Catfishing: Creating a fake online persona to deceive and manipulate others, often leading to emotional distress when the deception is revealed.

Online Polls and Challenges: Creating online polls or challenges that encourage others to vote or participate in harmful or offensive actions against a specific person.

Hacking: Illegally accessing someone's online accounts, emails, or personal information to cause harm, steal data, or spread false content.

It's important to note that online bullying can have serious emotional, psychological, and even legal consequences. Promoting online etiquette, empathy, and responsible digital behaviour is crucial in preventing and addressing cyberbullying incidents.

Kind regards

Corey Payton 

St James Chaplain