Student Wellbeing

‘Coping’ describes any behaviour that is designed to manage the stresses and overwhelming feelings that come with tough situations. By learning and developing positive coping skills in their teenage years, your child will build resilience and wellbeing and be set up with an important skill for life. It’s also important to understand the difference between positive and negative coping skills, and how these strategies can have very different long-term result

Positive coping skills will help if:

• your child doesn’t cope well with stress
• your child often feels overwhelmed
• your child’s health and wellbeing are negatively impacted by stressful events and difficult emotions.

What is positive coping?

Positive coping strategies increase long-term resilience and wellbeing. In contrast, negative coping strategies usually only produce a helpful distraction in the short term. For example, using drugs and alcohol may provide temporary relief from difficult emotions, but reliance on this strategy can lead to substance dependency and abuse. This is why a focus on positive coping skills is crucial in maintaining long-term wellbeing or resilience.

Why is it important to build coping skills?

Being young isn’t easy. The teenage years are accompanied by a number of stressors and significant life stages. Throw into the mix the hormonal changes that accompany puberty and an increasing need to fit in with their peers, and it’s no wonder that young people often find their adolescent years stressful and overwhelming. To tackle the difficulties that come with being a young person, it’s crucial to encourage young people to develop positive coping strategies. 

7 positive coping strategies

Talking it out

Encourage your child to speak up if they’re experiencing a tough time, by creating a safe space where their feelings won’t be judged. If what they’re going through doesn’t seem like a big deal to you, keep in mind that it’s very real for them, so be supportive and not dismissive. 

It’s also important not to force your child to speak to you if they really don’t want to. Instead, let them know that you’re here to help, but if they’re not comfortable speaking to you (which is okay and shouldn’t be taken personally), encourage them to speak to someone else they trust, such as a friend or another family member. 

Taking a break

Taking an active time-out from something that is causing distress is a great way to refocus thoughts and energy. If your child is having difficulty coping, let them know that taking it easy from time to time isn’t being lazy; it’s actually very healthy, especially if they’ve been experiencing a hard time. 

Doing something they love

Engaging in enjoyable activities can help lower stress and put them in a positive mindset. Some examples might be:

• taking a walk or using an exercise app
• listening to music
• writing, drawing or painting
• watching a TV show, movie or TED talk
• playing a game online or joining a sports team
• FaceTiming, calling, texting or physically hanging out with friends.

There are heaps of apps out there that can help your teen do activities or learn something new from the comfort of their bedroom. 

Eating well and exercising

It’s no myth that physical health has a big impact on mental health. Ensure that your child is eating healthy, nutritious meals that will help their body support them through tough times. Exercise can also help by releasing tension and increasing energy levels. 

Try getting as many vegetables, fruits and whole grains into your family’s diet. This might be things like choosing a wholemeal or grainy bread at the supermarket and swapping the after school biscuits to a pieces of fruit. Just as simple, easy and cheap but better for your whole family!

Using relaxation techniques

Teach your child some relaxation techniques that can help with relieving stress. Yoga or mediation apps are useful for this.

Engaging in positive self-talk

Let your child know that it’s okay to feel good about, and even to compliment themselves on, all their achievements, however big or small. Start by letting them know why you think they’re great, and encourage them to talk about what they like about themselves. This can help to increase their positive mindset and motivation. Encourage them to be mindful of their achievements and skills (or even to write them down) as a regular reminder of their strengths. 

Modelling positive coping behaviours

A really great way to encourage your child to develop positive coping skills is to model the behaviours yourself to show them what positive coping looks like. Confide in your child about times when you’ve found it hard to cope, and share with them the positive strategies that have worked for you. This will not only make them feel less alone, but will also reinforce the importance of seeking help.

Teaching coping skills to your teenager could be one of the most important skills they learn. They will help your teenager manage any obstacle that may get in the way of their endeavours. 

Chantelle Gianinotti

Student Wellbeing Coordinator