Wellbeing MATTERS!

Dear Families,

We’ve just worked our way through another seven day lockdown with home learning! Congratulations on your efforts and resilience to negotiate it this time!

I recently spoke with a Parent who was so positive about the lockdown - rejoicing in the extra time she could spend with her children and appreciating that time to work alongside them and share their learning journeys! I sincerely hope all families can find a ‘silver lining’ over the past couple of weeks. :)

Let’s now continue with our learnings about RESPECT…..

How Do We Teach Respect?

Here are the following three things we can do to help children to listen to and respect parents, teachers, themselves and others.

4. USE KIND AND FIRM DISCIPLINE TO TEACH, NOT TO PUNISH

Discipline means to teach or to train, not to punish. It doesn’t have to be punitive. In fact, studies have shown that positive discipline is a lot more effective and longer-lasting than punitive strategies.

If we discipline using a threatening or stern tone when our students/children have done something wrong, we are showing them how to be cruel and harsh to those who make mistakes.

Who doesn’t make mistakes?

Imagine if you make a silly mistake at work and the boss talks down to you in a demeaning way. That must feel really lousy, right? Would any of us, therefore, have more respect for this boss? No, right?

The same with children, being harsh or using punitive punishment will not earn us respect.

But positive discipline is not the same as being “soft” or permissive. One can be firm and kind at the same time when disciplining. Setting firm boundaries and sticking to them are the keys to successful discipline.

5. GIVE RESPECT TO EARN RESPECT

Parenting (and teaching) is one of the hardest jobs in the world. Parents spend so much effort, time and money to care for their little ones. Their entire lives changed and started to revolve around their children the moment they were born. It is only natural that we expect kids to respect their parents.

But little children don’t understand all this. And to be fair, they didn’t ask us to do all this! We ourselves decided to take on these responsibilities. We decided to have kids. Kids didn’t decide to have parents.

If we don’t respect them but at the same time expect them to respect us, that is just hypocritical. Think about a chain smoker telling his child not to smoke. How effective is that?! Respect cannot be demanded. It can only be earned. So, we need to earn it! But how do you earn respect?…

Give your child real reasons to respect you by being a good role model. Model good behavior such as being respectful to everyone, including our children.

6. APOLOGIZE WHEN WE SCREW UP

There can be times when we have an outbursts in the heat of the moment, especially when we’re dead tired doing all sorts of grownup stuff, like working, housekeeping, and what else, parenting/teaching. When we did lose it, give ourselves a time-out to calm down. Afterward, explain why we were so upset before. Teach our children/students that having emotions is normal, but shouting is not OK. Apologise.

As mature, respectful grownups we accept the responsibility and apologise when we make mistakes. Apologising to our children/students does not undermine us. On the contrary, we are reinforcing our credibility. We are demonstrating our integrity and building trust.

Parenting Tips For Teaching Kids Respect

Why not continue this conversation at home with your children and family members. Maybe talk about what this feeling of respect is like in your household. Happy conversations!

Please feel free to contact me if you have any concerns or queries.

Debbie Turvey

Pastoral Wellbeing & Learning Diversity Leader

dturvey@shtatura.catholic.edu.au

(03) 5824 1841

Stay tuned in our school newsletter for more ideas and conversations around promoting wellbeing and learning in our school community.

Have a great week, make the choice, be your best!