Chaplains Chat 

Having to go again into lockdown has been hard for most of us.  Many of us are feeling tired, drained, frustrated; with every day feeling like Groundhog day!   Energy is super low and as much as we would like to use this time as an excuse to kick back and relax, we have jobs and schooling to continue with.  So, we push on. Baking pinwheel scones and creating delicious dinners?  No, all I can muster up is eggs on toast and porridge,  for dinner.

The truth is, life is unpredictable.  Curve balls come so I’m determined to keep things in perspective and keep my emotions in check. Here are a few ideas to harness optimism, while still keeping a grasp on reality!

Kids love structure

Routine is really important. Kids love structure and in most cases Kinder and School have trained them well to operate within it. Creating a plan for the day helps everyone know what is happening and what the expectations are.  If you are working from home, some sort of schedule can also help ensure that you meet the needs of your kids while also managing your work obligations.  Try to mix things up and arrange some time to go for walks and get outside.  It’s a long day and it’s tiring, but it’s helpful to remember that it’s just a season – it won’t be like this forever.

Have a blowout

Sometimes structure can feel suffocating and hard to constantly manage.  Give yourself a break!  If there is a day where you can let loose, go for it.  If rain is in the forecast,  try to get the kids on top of their schoolwork and have some extra outdoor time, knowing that later in the week you’ll be giving them a full ‘PJ and TV’ day or two, complete with popcorn.  That’s memory-making stuff!

Try to inject a little more fun into each day. Going for walks and bike rides, hearing the kids chat away about all sorts of topics and ideas, can be a great way to spend the afternoon. Some other ideas are reading books together, with funny voices, and playing board games over dinner to end the day on a high. You could also do some baking (there’s some sequencing, reading and fractions right there!), doing chores and burning off energy with GoNoodle dance workouts could be a lot of fun together.

Keep perspective

You’re going to have some difficult days and it’s easy to  crawl into the pits of despair during these times of uncertainty.  However, I’d like to encourage you to try and and focus on the positive aspects of being in lockdown, even if you can only count one! (More time to binge watch  Netflix?) We will get this under control and we will get back to relative normality again soon!

Keep putting your own face mask on first

With all that’s been said, I’m well aware that lock downs can take a toll on our wellbeing.  It’s important to recognise that as a parent or caregiver, we really need to focus on our own mental health first, so that we can then care for others.  Keeping our own emotions as regulated as possible will help set the tone for our families. Calm creates calm. Panic breeds panic. Pause, Hold, Engage is a tool I recommend to help families find calm when emotions are going wild. 

Basically, Pause, Hold, Engage is a short phrase you can use to bring your own, or your child’s, emotional temperature down.  Pause and take 10 deep breaths. Oxygen is fuel for the brain. Hold and notice what you (or your child) are feeling right now.  Name it and accept it.  And then engage – explore why you or your child is feeling this way and how you can improve things with a solution focus.  If your mental health is in decline and you’re struggling to keep your emotional regulation in check, please reach out for help.  Talk to someone you trust, book a phone consult with your GP, or call a helpline if you need to vent.  There is no shame in feeling overwhelmed or anxious; it’s powerful and brave to get the help you need

Please click on the link below from Headspace, for some further tips to help you during this time.  Andre and I, are also just a phone call away and would love to have a chat with you. Remember, we will get through this as we care for and support each other.

Tips for Parents and Carers 

-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fw3LzWe-93U