Wellbeing

Empathy

Empathy is at the heart of what it means to be human. It’s a foundation for acting ethically, for building healthy relationships and managing different types of conflict. Empathy is generally defined as the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It is the ability to see situations through other peoples’ perspectives.  It is a social skill that some students can find quite tricky to develop. 

A sticking point for some children and adults is the difference between empathy and sympathy. The two appear similar, however are fundamentally different. Below is the link to a short clip from Dr Brené Brown, an American professor, social worker and author. It explains the difference between empathy and sympathy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw&t=1s

When considering teaching and learning about empathy, it is important to consider the developmental stages of our students and children and be mindful of what we expect from them. 

We often see in babies and toddlers, empathy start to develop from a very young age. A toddler might look at an adult who is upset, or try to console a crying sibling with their favourite toy or a cuddle. These are signs of empathy developing. There is an understanding of an uncomfortable emotion and a wanting to help. 

By the age of 3 or 4, children begin to develop cognitive empathy. This is the ability to see and understand things from another’s perspective. 

Empathy strengthens and fine-tunes as a child grows and matures cognitively and socially. While younger students can share and cooperate and give hugs when they see someone is sad, it is not until the age of 7 or 8 that they can really consider who is to blame for a disagreement or argument within a friendship. This is a skill that requires a deeper level of processing, including understanding and predicting how someone else was feeling and acting. There are many adults that struggle with this skill!!

The good news is that through Friendology, we are continuously developing and practicing our empathy and strengthen our relationship building skills.

Here are some ways that you can strengthen your child’s empathy at home:

• Empathise with your child. Explain how you are feeling and allow them to connect with you.
• Express your feelings so that your child can help to see how you feel in different situations.
• Read stories about emotions and feelings. Make connections between actions made in the story and the impact that it had on particular characters. 
• Be a role model. When you have respectful relationships and interact in a kind and caring way, your child learns from your example.
• Help your child understand other people’s perspective by talking about different viewpoints and opinions.

There are thousands of children's books that encourage us to look at empathy and kindness. Here a just a few to get you started:

As always, I am available via compass if you have any questions or would like to chat with me about anything wellbeing related.  You can also reach me via email - louise.jarvis@education.vic.gov.au

Have a lovely weekend,

Louise Jarvis

Wellbeing Specialist Teacher