College Counsellor

Self-esteem and social media

The following is an excerpt from reachout.com. For the full article click here: Self-esteem and social media - ReachOut Parents

Teenagers place a lot of value in the feedback they receive on social media. Likes, comments, and followers can make or break their mood or self-esteem. You can support your teenager by helping them to gain perspective and understand the relevance and importance of how people present themselves online.

Why is social media so important to teenagers?

Self-expression.
Social media is a mechanism for staying in touch with friends.
It provides them with social validation.

Help them have positive online experiences

Unsurprisingly, social media and self-esteem have a strong relationship. As a parent, there are lots of things you can do to help your child understand that social media follower count, likes, and interactions are not a measure of their actual worth.

Remind your teenager that self-worth will never be measured by numbers on social media. Instead, get them to think about and focus on the positive friendships and relationships that they have.
Discuss how social media is not a competition. Just because a person has more likes on their post does not mean their contribution is better or more interesting.
Talk about how little is being represented on social media. An Instagram post is only one tiny (filtered) moment from a person's day. It does not depict the full story.
Show them how to filter out particular content. If you know there is a person or theme that your child feels particularly upset or threatened by on social media, suggest they un-follow or hide posts from this person. This can be a good way to protect your child from comparing themselves to others while you talk to them about building a healthy relationship with themselves.

What to do if you're worried

Encourage face to face interaction to nurture meaningful friendships and relationships. Don't limit this to peers; include family, your own friends, and other people who can have a positive impact on your child.
Suggest positive role models for them to follow. Find some examples of people sharing content that is helpful and positive, and encourage your child to have more of this in their newsfeed.
Give them activities to do that don't involve screens simply telling them to get off their phone or computer doesn't engage your child in a positive activity, it just removes the online world. Instead, develop a plan for activities (such as sport, movies, taking short courses, or outdoor adventures) that they can engage with instead.
Get them to talk to someone. If you are really worried that their self esteem is being impacted negatively, talk to a teacher or GP. If body image is a big issue, The Butterfly Foundation offer free counselling.

Geoff McLean

College Counsellor