Social & Emotional Learning
Girton Grammar recognised as 2026 RULER Spotlight School
We are thrilled to announce that Girton Grammar School has been recognised by the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence as a 2026 RULER Spotlight School. This honour highlights our continuous dedication to fostering a supportive and emotionally intelligent environment for our students, staff and families.
RULER is an evidence-based approach to social and emotional learning (SEL) that helps school communities understand the value of emotions and build skills to manage them effectively. Girton began its work with RULER in 2011. Being selected as a RULER Spotlight School is a testament to our commitment to creating a learning environment where the wellbeing of our students and educators is the priority.
We are proud to be a model for other schools nationwide, showcasing best practices and strategies for effective RULER implementation. Thank you for your continued support in helping us achieve this milestone!
For more information about RULER and how you can continue to support this work at home, please visit https://www.rulerapproach.org/ruler-resources-for-families/.
Learn about Girton's approach to emotional intelligence at RULER Family Night
We invite all Junior School parents to attend our upcoming Parent Information Session outlining the RULER approach.
When: Tuesday 24 March at 6-7pm
Where: Junior School Library
This session will be presented by the Junior School RULER Implementation Team, and is designed to provide an introduction to RULER, including:
- Why emotions matter
- The skills of emotional intelligence
- RULER Tools (Charter, Mood Meter, Meta Moment and Blueprint)
- How RULER can be incorporated at home.
The evening focuses on recognising and understanding emotions, regulation strategies and conflict resolution.
Why Calm Kids Meltdown After School
What teachers and parents need to know about emotional overload and nervous system fatigue.
When six-year-old Oliver walks out of his classroom, he is smiling and polite, just as he has been all day. His teacher reports that he followed instructions, completed his work and was a kind friend. Yet, within minutes of getting home, Oliver dissolves. The wrong snack sparks tears, his school bag is thrown across the room, and he collapses onto the floor sobbing.
It’s an all-too-familiar story … the school day has gone well. Your child listened, followed rules, managed friendships, and did their best to stay focused. Then, within minutes of getting home, everything unravels … small frustrations become overwhelming and emotions erupt seemingly out of nowhere. For many families and educators, this puzzling shift is a familiar end-of-day pattern. What looks like sudden misbehaviour is often something far more predictable and human: after-school restraint collapse, a release of the emotional and cognitive effort children have been holding together all day.
To an adult, the shift feels sudden and confusing. For Oliver, it’s the moment his body finally lets go. After hours of concentrating, waiting his turn and managing big feelings in a busy environment, his nervous system has reached its limit. What follows is not defiance or poor behaviour, but a release of the stress and emotions he has been holding in all day.
In essence, restraint collapse happens because children spend hours at school using up their internal “self-control tank.” Throughout the day they navigate rules, social expectations, sensory demands and academic tasks. In doing so, they continually inhibit impulses, manage emotions and maintain attention. By the end of the day, this reservoir of energy is depleted. At home, often a child’s safest place, the “lid” comes off and behaviours that were held in all day are finally expressed, as described by the Institute of Child Psychology (2024).
It’s important for teachers and parents to recognise that restraint collapse is biological, not intentional misconduct. Psychologist Dr Robyn Koslowitz (2025) explains it is not a sign of poor parenting or deliberate defiance, but rather a predictable response to the day’s cognitive and emotional demands.
Here are six evidence-informed ways to support children through this transition that work across home and school settings:
Provide a calm decompression period
Avoid asking children to reflect on their day the instant they walk through the door. Open-ended questions like “How was school?” activate parts of the brain that are temporarily taxed after hours of self-control. Instead, allow a quiet settling period before conversation or tasks. Put some music on in the car or make small comments about things you see around you on your walk home. Once home, your child might choose to go to a cosy corner in the living room with cushions and favourite toys or some colouring. Allowing time to decompress can prevent dysregulation.
Address basic physical needs first
Often children are dehydrated, hungry or physically uncomfortable after school. Offering a balanced snack, water, and a bathroom break before attempting behavioural expectations helps “reset” the nervous system.
Encourage movement and play
Simple movement (e.g. a short walk, jumping, dancing or outdoor play) helps children release physical and emotional tension. It signals a shift from the structured context of school to the safety and freedom of home.
Be present with calm co-regulation
When a child is overwhelmed, low language, physical proximity, and a soothing presence are more effective than lectures or punishments. Offer a hug, sit with them quietly, and remain open. A calm caregiver helps the child internalise regulation strategies and feel safe to release emotion.
Prioritise flexibility over rigid structure
Keeping the same post-school routine can provide children with comfort and stability. However, it’s also important to be flexible when it comes to expectations. Sometimes, your child might need more down time or an earlier bedtime (especially at the start of the school year), so it’s important to be responsive to their changing needs.
Reflect and plan later
If your child has experienced restraint collapse, wait until they’ve settled before debriefing the experience. Let your child know that you love them … even when the meltdown monster rears its head. Engaging in gentle conversation about what helps them feel regulated can build self-awareness and coping skills without adding to their immediate stress.
Understanding restraint collapse helps us to reframe after-school meltdowns as a natural reset, not misbehaviour. It can be helpful for caregivers to remember that you are their safe place and that’s why your child feels they can finally let go when they see you. With patience, structure for regulation, and a focus on body and brain recovery, we can all make this daily transition smoother and more supportive for the young ones in our care.
Aimee Bloom is the Product Manager at the Institute of Positive Education. She is responsible for crafting the Institute’s Positive Education Enhanced Curriculum (PEEC) from ELC – 12. An experienced teacher and writer since 2005, Aimee has taught in both primary and secondary contexts, and has written content for a variety of government and non-government agencies. She is passionate about supporting teachers and ensuring the wellbeing of children, both in our schools and around the globe.
Concussion awareness
At this week’s Senior School Assembly, students heard a presentation on concussion, delivered by Daniel Hamilton from the Bendigo Concussion Clinic. The session aimed to help students better understand what a concussion is, why it should be taken seriously, and when medical follow-up is essential.
What is a concussion?
A concussion is a traumatic brain injury caused by a direct blow to the head, neck or body resulting in an impulsive force being transmitted to the brain. Symptoms and signs may present immediately, or evolve over minutes or hours, and commonly resolve within 1-2 weeks, but may be prolonged. Concussion results in a range of clinical symptoms and signs that may or may not involve loss of consciousness.
When should students seek a referral?
Students were encouraged to seek medical attention if any of the following apply:
- Severe initial symptoms at the time of the injury
- Inability to return to school after two days of initial rest
- Symptoms not improving after seven days
- Inability to exercise without symptoms worsening
- Returning to sport or high risk activities and needing complete testing
- Having had two or more concussions in a short period of time
Daniel emphasised that a concussion is not something to “push through,” and early assessment leads to better recovery outcomes. Students were encouraged to speak up, seek help and look out for teammates and friends who may be affected.
For more information, email admin@bendigoconcussion.com.au