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Wellbeing

Fiona Dandie & Robert Pain

Social Emotional Learning - 'Friendology'

One of the big things to remember is that when you start making new freindships its normal for things to feel awkward and uncomfortable at first!

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What are some ways to make and keep friends?

Here are 4 simple strategies to help kids make friends and get past the awkward stage. Role-playing at home can help kids feel confident in using these new skills

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Learn to be a Super Introducer!

A Super Introducer doesn’t hesitate; they immediately put out their hand, look the person in the eyes, and say, "Hi, my name is [insert your name]." What’s your name?” If role-playing with your child, be sure to act it out with confidence. Practice giving a proper handshake or a germ-safe greeting (elbow tap). Then, discuss the importance of eye contact. Talk about why it is important to look the person in the eyes. Finally, explain that we ask for their name to get the conversation going. 

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Now Ask and Pass

The "Ask and Pass" conversation strategy is a simple, effective method for teaching children to engage in two-way conversations, avoid interrupting, and maintain interest in others, often compared to playing a game of catch. It encourages children to be active listeners who contribute to discussions rather than dominating them or allowing conversations to die.

  • Ask: Encourage your child to ask "How" or "What" questions. These open-ended questions encourage the other person to talk, rather than providing one-word "Yes/No" answers. Examples include, "What do you like about...?" or "How did you do that?".
  • Pass: Teach your child that after they "catch" the conversation (by listening or answering a question), they should "pass" it back by asking a question or making a related comment.
  • The "Game" Analogy: Explain that conversations are like a game of catch. If one person talks non-stop, they are "hogging the ball". They need to pass the ball back and forth (the talking turn). 

 

Tips to Teach "Ask and Pass"

  1. Model Curiosity: Use open-ended questions yourself (e.g., "What was the best part of your day?") instead of closed questions (e.g., "Did you have a good day?").
  2. Role-Play: Act out conversations at home, perhaps at dinner. Practice asking a question and then waiting for the other person to answer.
  3. Prepare "Fact + 1": Teach children that if someone asks "How are you?", they can answer with a positive word ("Great!") plus one specific fact to keep the conversation going.
  4. Use "Wh-" Questions: Focus on teaching "What," "How," and "Why" questions, which are more engaging than "Do" or "Did" questions. 

     

Managing Interruptions "The Pass": If a child wants to interrupt, teach them to:

  • Put their hand on your arm: This indicates they have something to say, allowing you to finish your sentence while acknowledging them.
  • Wait for the pause: Teach them to wait until the other person stops talking to "pass" their thought.
  • Practice "Remind Me": If they fear forgetting their thought, teach them to say, "Remind me to tell you about..." when a pause occurs.
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Be Ready with a Quick Question

Have a few questions preloaded, ready for when you are lost for words. Questions need to be open-ended and useful in lots of situations. These ready-to-go questions help conversations go.

 

Example Quick Questions:

 

About Their Day (Instead of "How was school?")

  • "What was the most interesting part of your day?"
  • "What is something funny that happened today?"
  • "What was the best part of your day?"
  • "Did you do anything for the first time today?"
  • "Who made you smile or laugh today?"

     

Imaginative & Fun

  • "If you had a magic power, which one would it be and why?"
  • "If your toys could talk, what would they say?"
  • "If you could create your own game, what would the rules be?"
  • "If you were a chef, what would you serve at your restaurant?"
  • "If you could have a pet dinosaur, what would you name it?"
  • "If you could fly anywhere on a magic carpet, where would you go?"

     

Feelings & Friendships

  • "What is your favourite thing to do with your friends?"
  • "What makes someone a good friend?"
  • "What makes you feel happy/proud?"
  • "How do you know when you need a break?"
  • "What helps you calm down when you’re upset?"

     

Hobbies & Favorites

  • "What is your favourite thing to build with LEGOs/blocks?"
  • "If you could pick a new name, what would you choose and why?"
  • "What's your favourite thing to do in the car?"
  • "What is the best gift you have ever given someone?"
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Be a Friend Magnet!

The best way to make and keep friends is to be kind and friendly. Together, you could practise what kind and friendly body language looks like, smiling, making eye contact, waving, and using a warm tone of voice. You might even turn it into a game by showing different types of body language and asking your child, “Would this attract or repel a friend?”

 

It’s also important to talk about feeling shy. Let your child know that it’s completely normal to feel shy sometimes, and reassure them that they can still show friendly body language even when they feel unsure inside.

 

A key message we explored is the importance of being yourself. Encourage your child to talk about what they enjoy and what makes them happy. When children feel confident being themselves, they are more likely to connect with others who share their interests, helping them form genuine, positive friendships.

 

By practising these small, everyday behaviours, you can support your child to build confidence, strengthen social skills, and develop respectful, meaningful friendships.

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Ideas to Grow a Friendship

Introduce yourself: Say, “Who can remember the Super Introducer trick?” 

 

Have a conversation: Tell them to find something in common with the person, by asking and passing. For example, “Do you have a brother? Me too!” or “Do you play Fortnite? So do I!”  It is those simple connections that start a friendship. 

 

Ask them to hang out: Explain that it’s easier to ask someone to hang out if they have a plan. Saying, “Wanna play with me?” feels much bigger than saying, “Hey, wanna go on the monkey bars?” Of course, if their new friend doesn’t want to go on the monkey bars, they can say, “No worries. What do you feel like doing?” 

 

It’s their turn: Once they’ve asked their new friend to hang out once, wait and let the other kid reciprocate. Forming a friendship is a two-way street, so help them understand that they need to allow time for the friendship to grow. 

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SWPBS: Whittlesea World Term 1, Week 9

With the final week of Term 1 almost here, we celebrate the achievements of all students in what has been a highly successful term. This was evident in the massive turnout at Whittlesea World during Week 9. We want to congratulate all students who received a Golden Ticket this term for demonstrating our school values of 'Respect Your School', 'Help Others Succeed', and 'Do Your Best'. We want to make a special mention of our Foundation students, as most of them were trading their Golden Tickets for the first time. In total, more than 2,200 Golden Tickets were distributed throughout Term 1.  

 

Here is a snapshot of Whittlesea World from Week 9.

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