WELLBEING

Anxiety and Resillience Workshop

"Not Great but Not Crap"

Are you feeling, “Not great but not crap”, “blah”, “meh”, “average”, and “not happy but not sad”?

These are all terms that students, colleagues, friends and family are currently using to describe how they are feeling and it turns out there is a proper term for what we are all feeling. It’s called “languishing”.

The term Languishing was developed by sociologist Corey Keyes who noted that people who weren’t depressed, also were also not thriving. Languishing is not depression, we don’t feel hopeless, it’s not burnout, we still have some energy. But it’s a sense of stagnation and emptiness.

The definition of Languishing is to droop; fade; lose vigour and vitality; to suffer hardship and distress. In other words, it is not feeling like our best self or the opposite of flourishing.

Everyone is saying there is no reason or obvious trigger to why they are feeling the way they are. I say Yes there is! It’s called a global pandemic that started in 2020 and is still going. It’s called sudden snap lockdowns and remote learning; it’s called cancelled plans and not being able to do the things we were looking forward to.

If you or a loved one have been feeling like this, it is comforting to know that you are not alone and that there is a name for it. See article published in the New York times by Adam Grant regarding people languishing during COVID19 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/04/19/well/mind/covid-mental-health-languishing.html

But what can we do to stop Languishing and move back towards Flourishing again?

Build routine back into your lifestyle to re-establish feelings of control. Focus on the things you can control – ensuring you are eating good food, getting enough sleep and getting enough exercise.
Make plans to connect or reconnect with family and friends.
Focus on a small goal to avoid feeling overwhelmed.
Give yourself a break when needed. Really listen to your body these school holidays and take some time to relax or do nothing.

Savour and be grateful for the small things – start keeping a gratitude diary and identify 3 things you are grateful for each day.
Shift your thinking – instead of focussing on what you are missing out on (overseas travel, attending concerts, weddings, etc) focus on what you have gained (increased family time, time to slow down, increased time for hobbies, home projects)
Research suggests that living in the here and now and practising mindfulness makes you happier. However sometimes it can be helpful to have things to look forward to as this gives us the joy of anticipation. Start planning things again. I know we have all had plans cancelled in 2020 and 2021, however it is important to have things to look forward to in the future to give us hope.
Seek the support of friends, family and professionals if needed

And lastly, be kind to yourself and your loved one. We are going through a global pandemic and so many things are still out of our control currently.