Deputy Principal - Student Development and Wellbeing

Raising Girls - the best gig there is!

This week there is plenty to learn from the specialist views provided through SchoolTV about Raising Girls. Madonna King, well known author of  ‘Being 14’ and ‘Fathers and Daughter,’  is well versed in being able to provide an important perspective on what we need to consider when growing our young women to be the best versions of themselves. From her interviews with two hundred fourteen-year-old girls from across the country in addition to hearing from school principals, psychologists and neuroscientists Madonna’s book explores the challenges facing our young women today. Her insights have provided an understanding about what our girls are most wanting from their parents and in her video interview as part of ‘What do daughters most want from their parents’, Madonna notes that by far the biggest request from a daughter to a mother is that she listens to them and hears what they are saying. 

In her more recent work, ‘Fathers and Daughters’ Madonna helps normalise some of the relationship struggles that can become apparent between fathers and daughters as they move through adolescence. Madonna provides some great insight into the role of fathers in helping young women navigate their struggles as they search for their identity. As part of this week’s School TV videos, What’s the biggest connector between fathers and daughters, Madonna reveals the results of  asking 1300 girls about what they see as the biggest connector between fathers and daughters. It may or may not come as a surprise to hear that what girls most want from their Dads is for the opportunity to DO something with them such as sharing an interest in or participating in an activity or sport. The problem is, it won’t be the girls who will step forward with this request so it will be the Dad who will need to take the lead.  

No matter where you sit in the land of raising your daughter at this moment in time, it is important to remember that you are a part of an amazing journey. For some of you, the advice presented through SchoolTV will be very affirming while for others it could be an ‘Aha’ moment. All in all, appreciating and understanding the role that adolescence plays in your daughter’s growing independence helps to strengthen your capacity as a parent and ensure that you are helping them through some beautiful but at times challenging moments. 

I am a great fan of Lisa Damour’s book Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood. If you want to gain further insight into the amazing uniqueness of being a girl, then recognising the seven stages of adolescence will bring further AHA moments for you and some great tips on working through the struggles that your daughter may face. Understanding your daughter’s journey through adolescence helps you see that you are not alone. As co educators of your young women, we are all watching with interest as to how they will negotiate and eventually become the independent young women that we have helped them to be. What a great opportunity we have been gifted.