Wellbeing

Wellbeing as loving support

by Amir Tatai, Wellbeing Coordinator

“You don’t have to like everyone but you have to love them.” - Margaret E Lyttle

Wellbeing has many definitions, generally colloquially agreed upon as the state of being comfortable, healthy and happy. At Preshil, as stipulated by the Courage document, the ideal of wellbeing is slightly more complex and extends to nurturing and valuing relationships, creating safe spaces and building strong communities. The concept of wellbeing to me invites the amalgamation of two broader ideals: love and support.

Love, or unconditional positive regard as it is referred to in the clinical world of educational literature, is here meant in the sense that we as humans are intrinsically connected at multiple levels; finding a point of connection worth nourishing for mutual benefit could be termed love. Finding this point of connection at Preshil has not been difficult for me.

In both staff and students, I have seen countless examples of boundless ideals, a striving for thriving and an eagerness to take on the world. Love as a concept is obviously beyond singular definition, so I will simply recall the virtues and ideals most meaningful to me in this context: gratitude, bravery and kindness. In the face of adversity it can take bravery to be kind enough to be grateful for the experience. To me, this is living a loving existence.

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” - Lao Tzu

I have found it fascinating that, despite the array of intergenerational experiences we have all endured, we can still accept each other’s differences and work together, supporting each other in the relative utopian environment Preshil provides. I came to this School from a very different socio-economic-cultural-political context and it still feels very dreamlike walking through Preshil. This juxtaposition never lets me forget to utilise this opportunity in all ways possible. I really love and value this.

Support to me is holding space for people to feel safe enough to be themselves; to hold fast while wounds from “arrows of outrageous fortune” take their time to heal. Being vulnerable is one of the most courageous things we can do as humans, and I am honoured to hold space for those who have allowed me to be supportive for them.

Being supportive means actively listening and hearing in order to comprehend the issues as they present to our young people. Being supportive means providing a platform for which the harsh realities of adolescence and young adulthood can be viewed from alternative perspectives, in a safe, non-judgmental way. Being supportive means aiming to equip students with multiple strategies to meet life’s challenges with an eager smile; ever poised to breathe deeply and act with grace.

Combining the two, loving support  is the point from which I choose to operate. In practice, this  plays out in building trusting relationships, in vigilant observation and in pro-active service to aid all those in my care. My days as a lifeguard have evolved to providing additional aid in the form of strategies to better help everyone to help themselves. Knowing all the answers is not my job; knowing where to direct people to find their own answers is getting closer.

Wellbeing then, I suppose, is an ongoing state of healthy loving support  that inspires necessary resilience. It is through such resilience that the often harsh realities of life can be more gracefully weathered - the next mountain to climb will be more glorious than the last. Challenges will always arise. Having more strategies to deal with these challenges provides more potentially idealistic outcomes. As the delightful Scar teaches us in the allegorical role of the betrayer: ‘Be prepared’.

In line with Preshil’s 2023 Strategic Framework, we are preparing for a review of how we structure wellbeing at all levels; looking at strategies for how to move forward in the most altruistic sense for all within this community.

It is our intention to seek the feedback of families and alumni to help us find the direction the current and future students deserve. Early in Term 4 we will be asking for volunteers to scrutinise a set of statements/questions we will be posing to the students, to gain an in-depth understanding of where we are, where we are headed and where we would like to be. We would be grateful to hear your perspectives. 

For now, I wish you all a safe and lovingly supported spring break.